IF I HAD A PHD - by Casey

VERSE:
[A] If I had a P.H.D.
In every single 'ology
From [D] every insti-[E]-tution known to [A] man,

[A] I still would never know enough
To figure out the kind fo stuff
It [D] takes for me to [E] under-[A]-stand.

[A] Biology, Zoology,
Astrology, Phrenology
[D] They don't help as [E] far as I can [A] see.

[A] Psychology, Cosmology,
Or even Scientology,
A [D] woman's mind re-[E]-mains a myste-[A]-ry.

CHORUS:
[A] With [D] you [E] it's [A] hot and then it's cold,
And then it's [D] new and then it's [A] old.
How do I [D] know when I should [E] just walk [A] away?

[A] There [D] is [E] no [A] right, there is no wrong,
You say "hel-[D]-lo", you say "so [A] long",
I can not [D] win this Game Of [E] Life you [A] play.

VERSE:
[A] With all the things that women do,
I wonder if the Good Lord knew
The [D] challenge he [E] let loose upon man-[A]-kind.

[A] And so I study in a school,
How things work, the golden rules,
Yet [D] nothing useful [E] comes to [A] mind.

[A] Astrology, Mythology,
Geology, Cryptology
[D] They don't help as [E] far as I can [A] see.

[A] Chronology, Pathology,
And even Egyptology
A [D] woman's mind [E] remains a mystery. [A]

BREAK:

CHORUS:
[A] With [D] you [E] it's [A] hot and then it's cold,
And then it's [D] new and then it's [A] old.
How do I [D] know when I should [E] just walk [A] away?

[A] There [D] is [E] no [A] right, there is no wrong,
You say "hel-[D]-lo", you say "so [A] long",
I can not [D] win the Game Of [E] Life that you [A] play.

VERSE:
[A] If there every comes a day
When I can figure out a way
To [D] end up number [E] one, I surely [A] know.

[A] The victory won't last too long
At some point I will get it wrong
Then [D] back to school I [E] guess I'll have to [A] go.

[A] Herbology, Petrology,
or maybe Pharmacology
[D] They won't do I [E] think you'll all a-[A]-gree.

[A] What I really need to find
I something that's been on my mind
[D] I need Woman-[E]-ology. [A]

Oh [D] give us Woman-[E]-ology. [A]